For many people, a happy family is one of the most important life priorities. However, what and how it is built on is not written in school textbooks, so newlyweds often face many problems when deriving their recipe for an ideal relationship. There are tips from psychologists that are important to apply correctly in relationships with your family and friends.
What is a happy family?
The philosophical concept of happiness is a very vague feeling. In general terms, it can be described as an individual’s inner feeling of the joy of being. From this we can conclude that a happy family is a cell of society in which each individual feels the joy of living together, rather than if he existed separately. Many psychologists in the concept of what a happy family means, put a state of love and harmony between all its members.
The main qualities of a happy family
There is a common saying that all happy families are equally happy, and every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. With this folk wisdom, the ancestors tried to convey to the newlyweds that there are signs of a happy family that are unchanged for each generation. In such an alliance, the following qualities must be present:
- Respect, which is considered the basis of a strong marriage. Not only spouses should respect each other, but also children of parents and vice versa.
- Trust between husband and wife and in relationships with children is also very important. Total control, constant surveillance and checks are a signal of both the ill health of the relationship itself and the psychological problems of one or both partners.
- In a happy family, all its members are necessarily tolerant. This is manifested in the usual routine life in the same territory, when different people have their own habits, characteristics and habits.
What makes a family happy?
Psychologists invest in the concept of family happiness the successful implementation of the following functions:
- Householdthat is, the cell of society is built on the successful division between all members of the family of responsibilities for its life support: who earns money and brings food, cooks and cleans.
- reproductive. Many are convinced that the union of a man and a woman will be incomplete without their continuation in children.
- educational. That is, the mother and father should take responsibility for the upbringing and education of their own children, their education.
- Recreative. At home, in the circle of loved ones, parents and children should rest from external worries and problems.
- emotional-spiritual. In the family, each individual must develop spiritually, exchange emotions and find support and respect.
- sexy. The key to a strong relationship is harmony in the intimate life of the spouses.
- social. Happy parents and children can be considered full members of society.
Family values of a happy family
The main guarantee of happiness in the family is the presence of unshakable and revered values:
- Belonging to your group. Every child and parent should know and feel that he is loved by his family and needed by them.
- Reasonable Flexibility in Relationships. Rules and boundaries are needed, but situations in life are different, so it is important to be flexible with loved ones.
- Respect or complete acceptance of feelingsneeds and thoughts of another person, but not to the detriment of their own life guidelines.
- Honesty, without which it is impossible to create a long and strong union. Any lie will sooner or later come true and crack in an alliance that lasts years and even decades.
- Forgiveness and generosity. It is important for spouses and their children to be able to forgive each other in petty quarrels, to try to give without asking for anything in return.
- Communication and traditions. Happy are those spouses who always have something to talk about. A family is successful where there are favorite and unchanging traditions.
- Responsibility for one’s own deeds and deedsand the life steps of loved ones and relatives.
Bible principles for a happy family
In many religions, a big happy family is considered the standard of a righteous life. The Bible, like other religious books, contains the basic principles of its construction. These include:
- Choosing a single partner for life. Divorce is not welcome in Christianity. It is believed that God blesses people for marriage once, although there are exceptions.
- Recognition and respect for each other. The man is considered the head of the family, who is obliged to take care of his wife, and the woman is the mistress of the house.
- Intimate life is a bonding link for spouses. Infidelity and other forms of manifestation of sexual energy outside the marital bed are unacceptable.
- Children born in a legal marriage must be brought up in love and understanding. Offspring who see the honor and respect of their parents will be able to create their own happy union.
Laws of a happy family
Psychologists have tried to formulate the basic rules of a happy family in the form of laws:
- Law of Conformity states that people entering into marriage should have similar life values and interests, goals and vision of a common future.
- law of love. True feelings do not arise suddenly, they are created by specific deeds and actions of a man and a woman.
- According to the law of communication spouses with each other and children must learn to communicate effectively on specific and abstract topics. They should always have something to talk about.
- A certain amount of independence of each individual in the union. Only having personal space and delineated boundaries, people are ready to reasonably sacrifice their interests at the expense of the common good.
- Law of Development, according to which spouses, going together through life, must necessarily develop harmoniously in various areas. Only in this way will they be able to adhere to other laws.
Rules for a happy family for children
In order for children to grow and develop harmoniously, there are certain rules in a happy family:
- A family is a team in which all problems are solved together. There is always a leader in the team, whose final decision is not discussed. Adults should be leaders, not children.
- Each member of the cell of society has both its rights and obligations, personal time and space.
- There should be no competition between children who is better, faster or more beloved. Every child needs to feel loved for who they are.
- In the evening it is very important to discuss, for example, at dinner, how the day went. Sincere conversations and plans for the future are very close.
- Lies are recognized by children at the energy level, so you can never lie.
How to create a happy family?
In many manuals of psychologists and spiritual leaders on how to make a family happy, there are some recommendations:
- A man and a woman choose a partner who is close in spirit. Without initial points of contact, it will not be possible to create a solid foundation for marriage.
- Children are natural extensions of their parents. Such a family: parents plus kids and is considered complete.
- A large part of harmony depends on the proper organization of life and leisure.
- The share of humor greatly helps to brighten up the life and routine of life together. Everything that does not hurt personal boundaries is better to turn into a joke.
Secrets of a happy family
Elderly people who have lived together for decades are happy to share with young people the secrets of what kind of family is considered happy. According to them:
- All people in the house should have both their own personal space and a common area where they can gather and spend time together.
- Each individual is simply obliged to have hobbies and hobbies, both individual and those that can be done together.
- Parents should work, setting an example for their kids, and children should learn to take responsibility for their actions and fulfill their feasible duties.
- In a happy relationship, there are traditions, whether it is a joint dinner, the rules for creating New Year’s crafts or choosing a place for a summer vacation.
Why not everyone manages to create a happy family?
It would seem that the recipe for a happy family is simple, but not all people who get married manage to create a harmonious union. This can happen for a number of reasons:
- Imposed opinion of one of the spouses on the other. Without flexibility and mutual respect, there will be no harmony in the union of a man and a woman.
- Personal ambition and egocentrism. Where several people live together, a reasonable line must be drawn between personal interests and family good.
- Distrust and jealousy. Often such symptoms appear in psychologically immature individuals who need to first work out their inner world, and only then marry.