Sometimes fate throws us such puzzles, the solution of which we have to look for for years. Especially often the most difficult psychological problems arise where there are several participants who are forced to share a common territory: for example, work colleagues or family members. And if the former, being in bad relationships at work, return home, where the warmth of their relatives awaits them, then the latter have nowhere to go: after all, their home is no longer a fortress, but a real “field of military operations” with an enhanced psychological front.
Psychological knowledge about relationships in the family exists in order to resort to it when the relationship of relatives is “bursting at the seams”.
Fundamentals of well-being: the psychology of family and family relations
- a common problem. To restore peace in problem families, it is important that all its members realize that this is a common and at the same time personal problem: someone does something wrong, and conflicts are created on this basis;
- mutual assistance. To resolve any differences, it is necessary that people help each other even in reproach to their own interests;
- wars in which there are no winners. In any family conflict there are only “losers”, because the hearth is a place where a person can hide from adversity and restore his strength. If this “hotbed” becomes a conflict zone, then on the contrary, it requires a lot of effort.
Problem number 1 in the family and family relationships — responsibility
Lack of mutual responsibility is one of the most common family problems. Both adults and children must understand that they owe each other a lot: to give care and love, which must be shown not only in words, but also in actions. For example, forcing a tired husband to repair the door, the wife should understand that tomorrow he will go to work tired, and it will be more difficult for him to withstand the competition that reigns outside the walls of their house. Constant exhaustion will lead to the fact that he will stop working and bring money into the house. In turn, the husband, urging his wife to immediately prepare dinner or clean up the house after she returned no less tired from work, is irresponsible on his part.
How to improve relations in the family in this case? To solve the problem of selfishness and irresponsibility, you need to voice why you are doing this. Only through dialogue can family members be “accustomed” to caring for each other.
Problem number 2 in family relationships — a lazy husband or wife
The inactivity of the spouse offends with its injustice: why should someone work hard, and in the evening, in a “half-dead” state, fall on the bed from fatigue, while someone cools off all day and uses the work of another? This is also a fairly common problem in couples where one partner is a passive introvert and the other is an active extrovert.
How to improve such relationships in the family? Most likely, it is useless to explain to a lazy spouse how hard it is for you and that he should work, so you need to load him with work yourself. To do this, you need to reasonably and intelligibly explain what he should do today, tomorrow, in a month. It is better to start with short distances, so he can’t come up with excuses.
Problem number 3 of family relations — matriarchy or patriarchy
If there are two leaders in a family, or representatives of a matriarchal and patriarchal family, then the struggle for power cannot be avoided.
How to establish peace in the family? In this case, it is enough either to distribute the areas of “leadership”, or to come to a consensus — equal relations. It is enough for both to understand that every person is a person who requires a respectful attitude, and has the right not only to be listened to, but also considered right when this is true.