Mankind has recently stepped into the third millennium. But in all its history and stages of development, no topic has been discussed as often as the relationship between a man and a woman. Love was praised in poems and songs, it inspired people to create masterpieces and bold deeds. But it has always been the cause of suffering and sadness. Relations between spouses is a topic that will never lose its relevance and will be discussed forever. We will also touch this eternity, and at the same time we will try to figure out how to make the union of two people harmonious and correct.
Psychology of relations between husband and wife
As the practice of most psychologists shows, despite the individuality of each couple, problems relating to the relationship of spouses to each other are repeated from generation to generation. It all starts with the fact that each spouse is an independent and mature person with their own views on life, traditions of their families and habits. A smooth and ideal union of two different people cannot be a priori. However, the psychology of relations between spouses also implies working on mistakes, finding compromises, respect and trust in each other, which is often forgotten by most couples due to selfishness and inexperience. As a result, problems arise that psychologists call typical for most young families:
- lack of understanding;
- incompatibility of characters, habits and actions;
- Differences on those issues that require a common opinion.
The personal relationships of spouses often cross the border of confidentiality, and there is little good in this fact either. The main mistake most couples make is allowing their parents, other relatives and acquaintances to interfere in their lives. No one is able to solve the problems of spouses except themselves. Except, perhaps, the family psychologist. However, experts also note that those couples who come to consultations with certain problems usually either do not realize the essence of these problems, or underestimate their significance and do not believe that they can be solved. However, if you look at it, then even in such an individual and unique unit of society as a single family, you can develop harmony and avoid disintegration.
What should be the personal relationship between spouses?
In any relationship there must be an ideal. A kind of norm or set of rules by which most disagreements can be avoided. However, this ideal has nothing to do with the expectations that spouses draw in their heads. Another major mistake of any couple is a misunderstanding that the partner is not at all what it seems in the mind. So, here are some valuable tips that may help you avoid conflict or even divorce:
- Husband’s attitude towards his pregnant wife. No matter how many beautiful ladies complain about men, no representative of the stronger sex will ever be able to understand what pregnancy is. In this regard, you should not use your position and blame hormonal changes for everything. A man can also be understood and it is better to avoid outright mockery of him. As for the future father himself, it is advisable for him not to be embarrassed by his pregnant wife, to give her the maximum amount of attention and care and try to share the difficult fate with her as much as possible. As for the birth of a child, in this case there are no exceptions — a man, of course, gives a lot of time to work. However, do not forget that the spouse does not sit idle at home, and will always need help, support and mutual understanding. Psychologists advise young mothers not to forget that in addition to the child, there is also a husband who also needs support, tenderness and attention.
- Husband and wife are sexual relations. This problem is also as old as the world. Intimate diversity is the nuances of family life, which not everyone can boast of. And if one of the spouses starts having problems that have become the reasons for the lack of sex, it is best not to hide them, but to discuss them. No matter how hard the truth is, it is worth telling your partner before he comes up with other reasons for refusing marital debt. Otherwise, each of the couple, regardless of gender, will find a solution to the problem outside the family hearth.
- Property relations between spouses. Most couples remember this question only during a divorce. Although today the trend towards the conclusion of marriage contracts is developing more and more. These documents include the conditions for the division of jointly acquired property, common children, etc. So that there are no problems with such a question, no matter how strong the feeling of two people when they get married, it is better to conclude a contract.
- Relationships between ex-spouses. This question has many nuances and requires a separate discussion. However, it is worth noting that if during a divorce a couple has children in common, then none of the parties should prevent them from communicating with the other. No matter how bad the relationship of the former spouses may be, it is worth remembering that the children are not to blame for anything and equally love both parents.
The relationship between husband and wife can be different. But each of the spouses must remember the truths that will always remain unchanged and help save the marriage. They are support, respect, ability to listen and willingness to help in difficult times. If at least half of modern couples forget about their own benefit and selfishness, then the number of divorces will noticeably decrease.