What to do if your husband is abusive

Not every­one suc­ceeds in being mar­ried all their lives in per­fect har­mo­ny, and quar­rels are sure to hap­pen to every cou­ple. But what if the hus­band con­stant­ly and unde­served­ly insults his oth­er half?

Why does a husband insult and humiliate his wife?

What to do if a hus­band con­stant­ly insults and humil­i­ates his wife? First, find out why he does this. Here are the most com­mon rea­sons for this behav­ior.

  1. Very often, after the com­ple­tion of a roman­tic peri­od in a rela­tion­ship, a man begins to feel encroach­ment on his liv­ing space. And since men are by nature more aggres­sive than women, the wife’s pro­hi­bi­tions on vaca­tions with friends, hunt­ing and fish­ing trips cause such inad­e­quate reac­tions as insults. This is how a man express­es his protest against his wife’s attempts to “train” him.
  2. Accord­ing to sta­tis­tics, ear­ly mar­riages are not always suc­cess­ful, often a cou­ple of years after mar­riage begins a divorce process. Why is this hap­pen­ing? Psy­chol­o­gists say that this hap­pens because the cou­ple is not ready for mar­riage. First, the part­ners have enough of each oth­er, every­thing suits them. But after a while, one of them (more often a man) begins to under­stand that he was ringed ear­ly, that he had not yet had time to enjoy a free life. He express­es this dis­sat­is­fac­tion with the help of insults and humil­i­a­tion of his wife.
  3. What­ev­er they say about female sus­pi­cious­ness, men are also still those dream­ers. Some do not under­stand wom­en’s jokes at all and are ready to take every­thing at face val­ue. For exam­ple, a wife who returned from gath­er­ings with friends to her husband’s ques­tion “where were you?” he will say jok­ing­ly “yes, they invit­ed strip­pers with the girls, they had fun.” And the hus­band will begin to be jeal­ous, come up with a sto­ry of his wife’s infi­deli­ty and believe in it. But instead of clar­i­fy­ing the rela­tion­ship open­ly, he will bring his wife with insults.
  4. It hap­pens that a man shows aggres­sion towards a woman not for some objec­tive rea­sons, but because of his upbring­ing. Per­haps he saw such an atti­tude of his father towards his moth­er and is now copy­ing his behav­ior.
See also
White wedding dress

What should I do if my husband is abusive?

In any case, you need to talk to your hus­band. And you need to do this calm­ly, try­ing not to break into rec­i­p­ro­cal curs­es, so as not to pro­voke your hus­band even more. If the hus­band does not want to talk to you oth­er­wise than in a raised tone, insult­ing you, you should not con­tin­ue com­mu­ni­ca­tion. Respect your­self, do not let him com­mu­ni­cate with you in this way. Con­tin­ue the con­ver­sa­tion only when he behaves nor­mal­ly with you. But you should not delay the con­ver­sa­tion, the soon­er you under­stand the rea­son, the soon­er you will deal with fur­ther actions. Maybe he was just jeal­ous of you, and you need to destroy his stu­pid con­jec­tures as soon as pos­si­ble.

In addi­tion to a con­ver­sa­tion in which you will try to find out the rea­son for this behav­ior of your hus­band, you also need to pay atten­tion to his reac­tion to your actions. In which case he shows aggres­sion more often, when he feels pres­sure, restric­tion in any enter­tain­ment or his behav­ior, there is no expla­na­tion, and even he can respond to your affec­tion with aggres­sion and insults.

Hav­ing found out these points, draw con­clu­sions for your­self. A man who lash­es out at you because you for­bid some­thing to him is sim­ply try­ing to pro­tect his ter­ri­to­ry. Try to lim­it it less, because you also want to have the right to meet friends and go shop­ping?

Husband insults in front of the child

Now, if a man’s behav­ior has no objec­tive rea­sons, he breaks down on you for no rea­son, and to all the ques­tions “why are you talk­ing to me like that?” replies “yes, because you are a fool!”, there is no point in try­ing to save the fam­i­ly. After all, if a hus­band behaves like this all the time, insults you in front of a child, then the child absorbs such a line of behav­ior — since the moth­er tol­er­ates this, then every­thing is right. In this case, you don’t have to think about how to wean your hus­band from insult­ing you, look for approach­es to him and look for rea­sons in your­self. Since usu­al­ly such peo­ple are not inclined to improve over time, their demeanor only wors­ens and no one can guar­an­tee you that he will stop only at insults, he can even reach assault. You need it?

See also
Wedding decorator: everything is on the shelves